Single Mom Striking Out

I am doing everything alone. I see other people who get to delegate tasks amongst family members and I can't help feeling helplessly jealous that they have each other. It's no wonder I am so damn tired at the end of the day. I am only human.  Be kind to myself if others are not going to be kind or understanding to me. When I was young, I used to be indefatigable. I had this belief that I can be anything I wanted to be...whether it was a banker, singer, a business woman, a writer, a freelance worker without a boss.  I believed all of that and went headfirst into them all...and I am what I wanted to be. I am super proud of that fact.  Now, I just need to find that part of me again and keep that thought in my head. I can be whatever I want to be and just need to focus and continue giving it everything I've got. There's just so much to do - from preparing proposals to sending emails, from attending meetings/interviews to mopping the floor, from prepping...

Please tell me everyone goes through this - when you're really in deep with responsibilities, worries, and anxiety about the future, you tend to be really grouchy, ungrateful and full of complaints.  Today was such a day.  Son 2 was having problems with his computer, Son 1 was trying to get ready for his art exam and need supplies (he's worried and anxious too), and I am worried about my up-and-coming firing from a job that I've been at for the past 13 years.  I felt unappreciated, had to deal with everything on my own, and like my life ended when I met my ex-husband when I was 26.  Honestly, when we were at the mall, I felt like throwing myself off a balcony and just end everything. As I was passing small children in playgrounds, I pitied the parents for thinking that their kids bring joy, and I wanted to even scorn and make the kids cry.  I surprised myself for having so much negativity when I normally love being around children. They have...