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Emotions and Human Reaction

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Someone said something really degrading to me the other day which I think was meant to be a compliment. It made me feel cheap and like a sex object.

Why do people do this?

I am more than a vagina. I didn't live my whole life trying to attract men to sleep with me. In fact, I have gone out of my way to NOT do that because that is not what I want.

I have been through enough to KNOW that is not what I want and yet, why do men still do that?

Is sex all they think about? Or is it a result of what I project? In fact, my neighbor and his friends (and a former neighbor) just wanted me to sleep with the behind their wives' back.

Do I look that desperate? Maybe I should dress a little better? If that is what it takes, then I will do it! Seriously! Just so that men will stop thinking I am desperate for sex which I am not.

But maybe I shouldn't react to it. I rarely give first reactions these days. I always wait a few days after hearing something something from a friend or family, think about it, process the emotions that come along with it and THEN react to it in a way that I authentically feel. Not when I am highly stressed, angry, sad, happy, emotional, drunk  or otherwise impaired in thinking. 

I read that to feel is to be human. There's no escaping human emotions. But the thing is that I want to be authentic and I want the feeling to be more than a flash i the pan. 

This feeling of being treated like cheap piece of meat has lasted me a couple of days and I still feel like I don't want to talk about intimate body parts and what I 'prefer during sex' with a person I barely know. 

I will grant him one thing - he was drunk out of his mind. But you know what they say...honest words come out of a drunk man. I believe it was what he was thinking. But what he was thinking disturbs me and my peace. 

One day, I will find a way to show people that it is OK to be completely single and happy. 

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